I was thinking the other day about how I have not properly documented all of my projects on this website. This video was from February 2021. I probably didn’t post about it because I was busy getting ready for the premiere of Yes, No, Maybe So.
My colleague Tom Steward asked eleven San Diego theater artists to create videos based on his San Diego Fringe Festival comedy SPACE FORCE! Each monologue tells the story of a member of Donald Trump’s Space Force quarantined in outer space following an outbreak of The Moronavirus. Tom performed the first video himself and then released a new one each month in 2021. Here’s the full playlist of the project, entitled Space Force: Quarantine.
I decided to call my character “Captain Amanda Hugginkis,” and I chose “U.S.S. Covfefe” as a suitably Trump-ian name for the ship under my command. Watching this video two years later, I’m ashamed at my lack of video lighting, but I’m proud of my Janeway bun of steel, achieved by stuffing a sock with other stocks and sticking it under the front of my hair.
I’m also proud of the interview I did about this project with Tom and another old friend and colleague, Julia Giolzetti – mostly because I got quoted saying,
“San Diego is not Los Angeles’ backyard.”
Here’s my script from the video, including the lyrics to “Quarantine,” my parody of “Rocket Man”:
–
This is Captain Amanda Huginkiss’ log aboard the USS Covfefe, stardate 47457.1. I’ve just received word from Colonel Honeymustard Sanders that all members of Donald Trump’s Space Force, including myself, have been quarantined in space due to the moronavirus…and not only that, but our leader has been banned from Twitter, despite having hooked his brain up to it in order to keep him alive forever. Well, this is interesting news. How convenient that I have my vibraphone here on my spaceship so I can process my many feelings…
You’re thinking that you’re safe since Biden won
You got your country back, and Trump is gone
But you know he’s just hi—ding out…with Kim Jong-Un
Or maybe he could be with Putin now
They’re sipping vodka up in Moscow
We know how they li—-ke a golden shower
Well, it isn’t going to be a long, long time
He’ll come back to save his own behind
The Twitter ban won’t keep him off his phone
No, no, no, no
He’s just in quarantine
Quarantine – Donald Trump will not leave us alone!
A third of you believe that it was right
To take the capital by force
Yes, there could be qui—te a fight
I have to ask myself – who will I be?
I’m just a soldier here in Trump’s army
Am I a McCon–nell or a Romney?
Well, it isn’t going to be a long, long time
He’ll come back to save his own behind
The Twitter ban won’t keep him off his phone
No, no, no, no
He’s just in quarantine
Quarantine – Donald Trump will not leave us alone!
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