Here is the transcription of my third video blog, all about the horrifying state of the world:
(And here’s the audio on AnchorFM if that’s your jam)
Well, hey everyone. It’s Queen Mab back for Day 3 of this “vlogging” challenge. I’ve got my timer here to make sure that I don’t talk for longer than five minutes. And I wanted to talk about what has been on my mind besides Hollywood Fringe, which is the state of the world – particularly everything that’s going on in Afghanistan and in Haiti.
I think when I see these types of really intense world situations, particularly ones that have been caused or exacerbated by the United States of America, I immediately go into really intense shame, and then I start to think, “Well, what can I do about it? What can I do about it?” And sometimes this can lead to donating to organizations that might not be the best choice, like…I don’t know, I’ve heard things about the Red Cross, which is where I gave in the earthquake that happened in Haiti in 2010. I know there’s lots of other organizations that would be much better to give to, I just need to do my research. And when it comes to Afghanistan, I mean that’s…you know, that one is really tough for me, especially when I think about the fact that all of that has been going on since I was in high school, before I was even able to vote.
Um…I said “um”…whoops…I’m trying not to do that…oh well.
But I guess what I want to say is, I’m doing all of these little posts about Fringe, and the stuff that I’m doing, and then I immediately go “Okay, well, why am I talking about this when all of these really difficult things are going on in the world?” OH, and global warming! I forgot to talk about that! That’s another one that I just, you know, I’m worried about it every single day.
So I was talking with some friends about all of this last night, and, you know, I was coming back to two things. I was coming back to the Serenity prayer – right? – about the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Oh, and the serenity to accept the ones I can’t change, but I don’t know…that just kind of makes me throw up in my mouth. That’s the part of the prayer that everyone focuses on, but the courage and the wisdom – I like those parts much better than the acceptance part. And then the other one is that prayer “Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace,” okay. Now, I’m not advocating here for any particular religion. My own religious beliefs are too complicated to explain here in five minutes. I will say, though, that it helps me to say at least that portion of the prayer, “Make me an instrument of thy peace,” even though I feel really phony doing it. I’m not even really sure that I know what peace is. You know, for all of my lifetime, I think…um….the United States has been at war in one way or another, even if it’s domestically…you know, the “war on drugs” or the “war on terror” or any of these ridiculous things, and so I have to stop and really think about it.
I don’t consider myself to be a very peaceful person. I consider myself to be a really intense and complicated and difficult person, so to be praying “make me an instrument of thy peace”…it’s like saying, “Hey, why don’t you make me into a Tyrannosaurus Rex or a beautiful swan,” or I don’t know, just…it just…it feels really fake… but I don’t know what else to do. I don’t know what else to say.
And, you know, when it comes to talking about Fringe or the arts and things like that at a time like this, I think it’s something that human beings need, and I also think that there are a lot of really important shows that are happening right now that are talking about these kinds of issues. There are a lot of identity-focused shows. Um, I also talked about my friend’s show who was in the Peace Corps and talked about being in Morocco and dealing with her American privilege and all of that [I Heart Maroc by Azo Safo], so you know…I…I guess I can forgive myself for talking about these things when the world is going through the process that it’s going through.
So hey, if anyone out there is listening, I’d love to know about your definition of peace, like, what…you know, if you’re saying “Make me an instrument of thy peace,” like, what does that actually mean to you? Because over here on my end, I’m still trying to figure it out. Okay, that’s all I have for today. Thanks for tuning in!